TNA AGAINST ALL ODDS 2012: THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE FUGLY

By Justin Henry

(All feedback for this article can be sent to its author, either on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/notoriousjrh) or Twitter (https://www.twitter.com/cynicjrh)

Here, in order, is a list of the most important occurrences at TNA Against All Odds from worst to best, as judged by me. The numbers preceding each block of entries is the score given to that particular moment (Zero sucks, a four is mediocre, seven is good, ten is excellent, etc.)

As an additional note, I won’t be including Jesse Sorensen’s injury on this list. As a real life occurrence, one not planned or scripted, I have no interest in trivializing it compared to the efforts of the creative team and the workers. I just wish him a speedy recovery, and hope that he isn’t too badly injured after that accident with Zema Ion.

Here we go.

0.0

-Mike Tenay adding no emotion to his commentary. In the Don West days, Tenay used to yell louder than necessary during the dramatic portions of the event. Now, he’s swung 180 degrees and doesn’t even go nutzo, even when AJ Styles or Alex Shelley does something that would have made Don West scream “ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!?” When I tallied the votes for the 2011 RSPW Awards, I noticed a lot of dislike for Tenay in the ‘worst announcer’ category, dislike that wasn’t there in previous years. Maybe three years of working with Taz, plus some complacent booking, have dulled his skills. I just hope he can pull out of the funk, because with Jim Ross seldom used by WWE, Tenay’s one of the last “true fan” announcers left.

1.0

-The crowd, which was dead for the first half of the show. Do you blame the freeloaders who just sit there for three hours for creating a dead atmosphere, or TNA for saturating the same crowd for 8 straight years? I hope they can finally tour a bit more in the coming months. That London crowd spoiled me.

-Jeff Hardy painting eyeballs on his eyelids, and they “stare” at you when he has his eyes closed. Creepy stuff. I’m gonna have nightmares for weeks, I think. But if that’s what he does in his spare time to steer clear of illicit drug use, then paint away, dude.

-My apologies to Justin Roberts: So Cal Val is the worst ring announcer ever. She sounds like a 12 year old male member of the Little Rascals when she talks.

2.0

-Garrett Bischoff not looking all that terrible in a twelve minute match. But, given his skill level and repetitiveness (he threw about 7000 punches and 4000 armdrags by my count), they’re better off shaving six minutes off of it. Not sure if the Ion/Sorensen botch caused things to be thrown off time-wise, so I’ll just say Garrett didn’t make too much of a fool of himself out there and be satisfied with that.

3.0

-The possibility that Matt Morgan and Crimson are going to split up, now that a miscue cost them the Tag Team Titles. There hasn’t been a decent powerhouse team in a long time and, with a lack of truly consistent teams on the TNA roster, they were having a decent three month run. Crimson isn’t exactly over as a singles competitor, despite the long winning streak, but teaming with Morgan gave him some decent balance. Splitting them after just three months would be a very WWE-like move.

-Tenay eagerly asking to see replays of Jesse Sorensen’s injury, as if he was auditioning cuts for the next Faces of Death video. Easy on the sadism there, Mike.

4.0

-TNA dragging out the Daniels/Kaz/Styles “Why is Kazarian so unwillingly obedient to Daniels?” angle. It’d have been fine having a revelation after two weeks or so, but going this long without Styles (or anyone else) getting a straight answer is a bit excessive. As long as it leads to great matches between the three of them, I can live with it, I suppose.

5.0

-A respectable effort by Jeremy Borash, who filled in for Taz (who was absent due to a death in the family). Borash is by no means a great announcer, bit you can tell he cares about the product. Enthusiasm is always welcome, and he’s a hard-working man.

-Two ref bumps and a belt shot in the main event. While I prefer clean endings, at least this time, there were reasons for doing them. Sting accidentally knocking Hardy out paves the way for Sting/Hardy at Victory Road, which gives them a chance to make up for the debacle from one year ago. You needed Roode to win, and you needed a way to get there by having Sting get involved. This is ranked lower, because the dead crowd would have made it so much better with a stunned reaction, but instead they were, well, a dead crowd.

6.0

-The cheesy Vegas showtune used the show’s theme song. TNA too often uses generic-sounding rock/nu-metal tracks for their shows, so at least this one stood out. Had the show actually been in Vegas, it would have been even better.

7.0

-The funny exchange of Zema Ion taking away the football that Jesse Sorensen gave a fan, just because Ion couldn’t bribe that same fan with his cherished can of hairspray. Ion makes a wonderful self-absorbed, douche villain (kind of an update of Rick “The Model” Martel).

-Robbie E put forth a great effort in an impromptu match with Shannon Moore. Some may label Robbie as a ripoff of Zack Ryder, but there’s a common link there: both men work their asses off to get silly gimmicks over, and Robbie has proven he has no problem playing the obnoxious idiot that often gets his comeuppance. If he stays motivated and sharp, he’ll be a key piece of the evolving creative staff’s vision for the future.

-The fact that Austin Aries’ cape reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where George’s dad hired a lawyer (played by the legendary Larry David) who wore a cape for seemingly no reason. The episode ends when the cape-wearing weirdo pulls a suicidal woman off a bridge, and when she asks him “Who are you?”, he merely responds, “I’m Frank Costanza’s lawyer.” That’s just my long-winded way of saying I hope Aries wears the cape out in public.

-Daniels trying to make Kazarian wrestle the match with a Daniels t-shirt on. As you can clearly see, self-absorbed heel schtick is highly regarded in my mind.

-Hulk Hogan getting into it verbally with Earl Hebner in the Garrett/Gunner match. Was I the only one with the nostalgic gleam in my eyes, saying “TWIN REFEREES! TWIN REFEREES!”?

8.0

-Austin Aries going old-school heel by crawling underneath the ring twice to try and surprise Alex Shelley. Worked the first time, didn’t the second time. You can tell Aries watched a lot of wrestling in the eighties.

-Beer Money temporarily reuniting to suplex Bully Ray. Then, as Roode tried to butter up to Storm (in exchange for his help during the match) by beginning the “BEER! MONEY!” chant, Storm attacked him. Getting to see the chant once again would have made it a perfect ten, for sure.

9.0

-The lack of screwy finishes helps. The main event had a belt shot, which could lead to a Sting/Hardy rematch at Victory Road (to make up for last year), and Robbie T provided tame interference for Robbie E (as any bodyguard would be prone to do). That said, there was nothing convoluted about the endings tonight. Another sign that Russo is history.

-Seven minutes of women’s wrestling. Eat your heart out, McMahon

-Samoa Joe has a belt again! What a coincidence that he gets to be a champion the same day it’s announced that Vince Russo has likely been eighty-sixed by the company. Maybe it’s telling us something….

-Bully Ray’s verbal abuse of Christy Hemme. Say what you will about TNA, but at least they don’t try to script Bully Ray into a corner. No one could rile up those ECW crowds like he did over a decade ago, and with his gift of trash talking, letting him go makes for entertaining TV. Bully Ray’s my comeback star of the last year.

-Styles and Kazarian putting forth their usual great match.

10.0

-Austin Aries and Alex Shelley saving the show from flatlining with a tremendous X Division Title match. It was a seesaw battle back and forth, complete with both men kicking out of each other’s finishers, and ending with a clean win for Aries (but one that still offers wiggle room for Shelley to get a rematch).

-Deserving of its own bullet point: Aries hitting Shelley with a Death Valley Driver on the apron. Shelley’s sell job of staring vacantly into space made it work (At least, I HOPE he was just selling…..)

-Vince Russo being gone. I immediately had flashbacks to Krusty the Clown when he bellowed, “POOCHIE’S DEAD! HOOO HOOO HA HA!!!!!”

(Justin Henry is a freelance writer whose interests are rooted in NFL, MLB, NBA, wrestling, MMA, and entertainment. He can be found on Twitter at https://twitter.com/cynicjrh and on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/notoriousjrh so check him out)