Jamie Hayter joined Renee Paquette on the latest installment of “Up Close” on YouTube this week, where she discussed her 15-month hiatus from AEW due to injury and the challenges she faced during that time.

When asked if she ever doubted her return, Hayter was candid:

“Absolutely,” she admitted. “Sometimes, it wasn’t necessarily the injury. It was, ‘I don’t know if I want to.’ It got to a point where, ‘I don’t know if I even want to do it again.’ I don’t know why. I think it was just the pain and everything that happened. I really wasn’t sure. It’s almost like I had to find myself again. Find my purpose and find my passion to do it again.”

On rediscovering her purpose, Hayter shared what eventually helped her regain her passion for wrestling:

“I think when the pain from my injury kind of subsided a little bit. That’s when I could see the light a little bit more,” she explained. “I was in pain constantly. It was not a fun injury. I was bed-bound for months. I couldn’t do anything. All I had was watching stuff on my phone, lying in bed, and reading some books. When the pain subsided and I could start to move again, for me personally, being physical is my enjoyment.”

Hayter went on to describe her return to the ring and how that helped her reconnect with her passion:

“Getting back into a gym. The first time I got back into a ring, I felt alive again. The first time I hit my body on the mat again, it felt good,” Hayter recalled. “Honestly, it was just being back in the ring. I couldn’t visualize myself in it. I watched AEW at home and I couldn’t imagine myself doing it. I couldn’t imagine myself being in front of however many people. It was a weird space to be in. When the cogs started turning again and things started to fall into place, ‘Oh, I can.’”