WARNING: This article is auto-tagged for potentially containing spoilers. If you are looking for spoiler free content turn back now! Last chance!
Vinny here! Due to technical difficulties, Quinn will not be able to recap Raw tonight. Enjoy the show!
We are LIVE IN CHICAGO! Tonight's card is run down and...
CULT OF PERSONALITY BLARES THROUGH THE ARENA!! HERE COMES... Paul Heyman.
Paul Heyman panders to the crowd as they loudly chant Punk's name. Paul eggs on a louder chant, walks around the ring with mic to crowd and takes an indian style seating ala Punk in the middle of the ring. Paul wants to tell us the story of a "Paul Heyman Guy". Paul goes on to say that Punk is a guy who had too many tattoos, he was too small, rebellious attitude and that the WWE didn't want him then and they still don't want him right now.
Ladies and gentlemen, Paul Heyman is here for his own Pipe Bomb about C... M... PUNK! Who isn't here this evening. Paul is just as dissatisfied about Punk not being here like the rest of Chicago. He says there IS someone to blame because there IS that someone and he is going to point his finger at the person responsible for Punk not being here and that person is.... each and every single one of you (us)!
Paul Heyman talks about truth and the truth hurts. CM Punk was the longest reigning champion in the modern era but it was the fan's who took Punk away from Heyman. Heyman also puts blame on the Undertaker because after last year at Wrestlemania, Punk and Heyman were not able to beat the Streak but FEAR NOT, the Streak will be beat, it will be conquered, the Streak will be broken by his best friend, the Conqueror, the Beast Incarnate, BROCK LESNAR!
Cue Brock. Brock enters the ring and Paul wants to take a look at last week's Open Contract when the Undertaker jammed a pen in Lesnar's hand and put him through a table with a Choke Slam. Crowd doesn't care. They still chant for Punk and Lesnar gets mad so he takes the mic.
Brock says that he believes deep in his heart that the Undertaker is deathly afraid of Brock Lesnar. Many guys- Shawn Michaels, Triple H, and your baby boy, CM Punk- couldn't get the job done. The streak will be broken by Brock Lesnar!
As Heyman and Lesnar exit the ring, Mark Henry's theme plays and out comes Sexual Chocolate to confront for breaking his arm. Like two bulls, they charge each other and start to scrap. Brock gets the better of Henry with a shoulder tackle that sends him to the floor. Lesnar gets the ring steps and knocks Henry in the bald of his head. Brock Lesnar then tears apart the announcer's table, tosses the monitors, and grabs Mark Henry, hoists him onto his shoulders and delivers a devastating F-5 through the announce table!
WWE Tag Team Championship Match- New Age Outlaws (C) Vs. The Usos
Oh, you didn't know? The Outlaws are out first marketing Wrestlemania 30 jerseys. Road Dogg runs down the crowd and says they aren't worthy to hear his catch phrases so he hands the mic back over. Usos are out, amped, and ready to challenge the tag team champions of the world!
Jey Uso starts the match with Road Dogg. Both tangle up with Road Dogg getting the upper hand. Jey gets his knee rammed into a turnbuckle, goes down. Billy Gunn quickly tagged in for a couple shots of his own then Road Dogg back in. He gets Jey in the corner, Road Dogg starts with some chops, Jey then gets an upper hand with chops of his own. Jey whips Dogg off the turnbuckles but gets reversed, hits the opposite pads, and gets dropped with a Clothesline from the Road Dogg. Billy gets tagged in, beats up Jey, and then throws him outside the ring to a commercial break.
We are back with Jey and Road Dogg in a rest spot. Road Dogg blind tags Billy into the ring, Jey gets a roll up but is booted in the face. Billy takes a few shots, Road Dogg tagged back in. Dogg works on Jey until a big Uso dropkick takes down the Dogg! Both guys down, Jey struggles to his corner but HOT TAG to Jimmy! Road Dogg tags in Billy! Jimmy starts to clean house! He fights off Road Dogg, drops Billy Gunn with a Samoan Drop! Road Dogg tries to come back but gets dropped on his ass with a Full-Nelson Atomic Drop! Both Outlaws are in opposite corners and Jimmy does a Double Hip Attack! Cover, count, 1... 2...NO! Billy gets back to his senses and is able to reverse a Jimmy's high-flying attack into a Tilt-A-Whirl Slam! Jimmy struggles to his feet after a two count. Road Dogg is stopped on the outside of the ring by Jey! Jimmy gets a tag to Jey! Billy goes for a clothesline but Jey ducks! Superkick! Jey climbs the top rope, USO SPLASH, 3 COUNT! NEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS!
Winners: And NEW WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS, THE USOS
A clip from "Need To Speed" plays. Aaron Paul is on his way to the arena, bitch! The Divas swoon over him.
Cesaro Vs. Big E
The Real Americans are out already and we come back to Big E. taunting on the ring apron. As the match starts, both guys grapple and Cesaro hits an early Tilt-A-Whirl Backbreaker on Big E! Big E recovers, charges at Cesaro but gets dumped outside the ring. Swagger tries to attack Big E but E fights him off and goes back into the ring. Cesaro sweeps Big E onto his back and GIANT SWING! It's rather mild this time around but does the job until Swagger runs in the ring and Swagger Bomb onto Big E!
Winner: Big E via DQ
Cesaro argues with Swagger after the match. Jack argues with Uncle Zeb. Big E drops Cesaro with the Big Ending.
The Shield are out and their re-match with the Wyatts is next!
The Shield Vs. The Wyatt Family
Wyatts come to the ring. Both sides are all business tonight. If this is anything like the Elimination Chamber...
Rollins and Ambrose fly over the top rope onto Rown and Harper! Bray in the ring, dropped with a Samoan Drop from Reigns, he gets tossed from the ring! Everyone groups together and Rollins and Harper start the match. Off to the races, as Rollins and Harper do the "German Suplex into a Back-Flip" spot! Rollins clotheslines Harper out of the ring! Rollins bounces off the ropes and Senton Splash outside the ring onto Harper! He comes back in and goes to the opposite side where Erik Rowan is just getting back up and put back down with another Senton Splash! Harper tries to come back, possibly attempting a Suicide Dive but Rollins kicks him in the head! Harper stumbles down and back. Roman Reigns looks like he's enjoying all the action! Dean Ambrose coems in the ring, attacking Harper as Rollins climbs the top! Here comes Bray and knocks Ambrose into the ropes, making Seth lose his footing. Reigns is all, "What the hell?" Everyone regroups as we go into commercial.
Harper and Rollins are in the ring from commercial. Seth Rollins looks to make the tag but Ambrose went off the apron to talk smack to Bray. Reigns went to get Ambrose back to his corner and Seth is pretty S.O.L. Erik Rowan is tagged in, gets beat on, and then Harper comes back in and boots Seth Rollins! Rowan gets back to his senses but gets face planted into the corner! Seth finally gets to the corner, tags in Dean Ambrose. Ambrose goes on some heavy offense on Rowan, tying up his leg in the ropes, and drop kicking it! He picks him up, Dragon Screw, and Figure Four from Ambrose! Ambrose gets a nice arch in the move but Harper is in and Double Stomps on Ambrose's chest breaking up the move. Harper is knocked out of the ring by Reigns. Erik Rowan though stays on Ambrose into the corner, work on him by keeping him isolated and frequently tagging in and out. Harper-Bray-Erik Rowan all get their shots in. Rowan tags in Harper who gets dropped with a hard clothesline from Ambrose! Harper tags in Bray but Bray gets dropped! Ambrose crawls for a tag to Rollins but ROLLINS HOPS OFF THE APRON AND WALKS OUT!
Reigns tries to make sense but Seth says he can't keep this together, Ambrose and Reigns can figure it out and stands on the entrance ramp! It's now Two Vs. Three. Reigns comes in, breaking up a Bray Wyatt count! Reigns comes in and clears house! He drops Bray with a Superman punch! Rowan knocks Reigns out of the ring and Harper takes out Roman with a Suicide Dive! Seth Rollins watches on as Bray Wyatt lays out Dean Ambrose with Sister Abigail. That's all she wrote.
Winners: The Wyatt Family
Renee is with Batista to talk about his match with Daniel tonight.
-WrestleMania 30 promo
-WWE Main Event is Live tomorrow on the WWE Network
Fandango & Summer Rae Vs. Santino & Emma
Emma and Santino high-five each other which leads to switches from Fandango and Rae. Santino gets in, Emma and him finally realize what their doing, Fandango attacks Santino from behind. He starts to put the boots to the Milan Miracle. Quick count on Santino, Fandango drops him with a Suplex then climbs the top for a Leg Drop but Santino rolls out of the way. Fandango lands on his feet, kicks Fandango, and Santino Stunner! He quick tags in Emma which means Rae is now in. Emma on fire, starts to unload on Summer, she does her hand dancing into a Discus Clothesline. Emma Sandwich, Emma-Trantuala, and submisson finish off Summer Rae! (I'll have to note Emma's move-name's for the future! Unless someone down there wants to point this out :-)
Winners: Santino & Emma
Sheamus and Christian are next!
-WWE Network plug
Christian Vs. Sheamus
Stare down to start. Christian smacks Sheamus twice, charges Christian, but Captain Charisma high tails it outside the ring. Sheamus goes on the chase and catches Christian. He beats him up, throws him into the barricade, and throws him back into the ring. Sheamus stays on Christian, chokes him with his boots, picks him up for a high body slam, and drives him to the mat! Knee Attack off the ropes from Sheamus and a two count. Christian swings into momentum with a slap, Sheamus stumbles down and Christian chokes him with his boot while he taunts. Sheamus comes back with a couple of shots, drills him in the middle of the ring but Christian continues with the open handed slaps. He goes off the ropes and Sheamus catches him with a Lifting Backbreaker! Two count and Christian reverses an Irish Whip only to get kicked in the face. Christian backs into the ropes, Sheamus charges but gets dumped over the top. Christian with a Baseball Slide Dropkick! Both guys fight outside the ring again, move to the announce table where Christian hides behind the announcers for the commercial break.
Were back with Christian climbing the ropes but Sheamus takes him down. He goes to climb the ropes but Christian pushes the Celtic Warrior to the outside! Falling off a cliff! Both guys are back on the outside with Christian beating up Sheamus. He rolls him back in the ring for a two count. Christian continues the assault. Sheamus fights back but the veteran regains control quickly, dropping Sheamus with a back body drop. Christian climbs the ropes for a Frog Splash but misses! Sheamus comes to, gets on Christian, he lifts him up for a Fireman Roll! Both guys fighting hard, Christian gets a shot, but Sheamus drops him with two Ax Handle shots! Christian to the corner and gets rammed by a Shoulder Tackle! Sheamus tries for the 10 Chest Clubs, Christian fights it, but gets it anyway. Both guys stall for a moment, the crowd starts to chant... "This Is Awful"... Christian is able to drop Sheamus with a Reverse DDT and then climbs the rope for a Frog Splash that gets a 2! CM Punk chants come ringing in again, a White Noise from Sheamus gets two, and now they get a "Boring" chant. Man... Christian ends up eating a Brogue Kick from Sheamus who was on the ring apron and that's that.
Renee is backstage with Sheamus and Christian attacks him! Christian beats him with a light! Killswitch.
The Bella Twins Vs. Aksana & Alicia Fox
The ladies are already in the ring but Niki and Aksana start off the match. Niki makes some quick work on Aksana dropping her with a Dropkick and then a Sit-Down Neckbreaker. Brie in the ring, gets in her offense that includes shouting and a Running Knee Strike to Aksana who is tied up on the ropes. Alicia Fox gets tagged in and gets the better of Brie, appyling a Chin Lock to slow her down. Brie tries to get to Niki but Alicia keeps the chain moves going, bringing Brie back to her corner, tags in Aksana. Aksana and Alicia double team Brie with a Lift-Up Slam! Brie got some height! The crowd chants "We Want Puppies!" Haven't heard that in some time... Niki gets the hot tag from Brie who comes in and starts to attack Alicia with a flurry of strikes and a Knee Smasher. Niki takes complete control and ends the match with an Argentina Backbreaker.
Winners: The Bella Twins
-TV show, Sirens, plug airs
Daniel Bryan Vs. Batista
Daniel gets on the mic. Daniel loves to hear the chanting, says we all have a voice and tonight WE ARE GOING TO HIJACK RAW! The crowd eats that up!! Daniel won't leave the ring until one of two things happen... Crowd insists CM Punk which gets Daniel smiling, however, either Batista get down to the ring to fight or Triple H come out to accept his challenge for a fight. He gets the latter.
The McMahon-Helmsley Faction come on out to the ring. Stephanie gets on the mic, the crowd drowns her out with BOOOOs! She says that she admires his heart considering all of his losses. Daniel says that no matter what they throw at him, he's going to keep coming back and wants an answer from Hunter. HHH tells him that's not going to happen, saying his Era is going to be called the "Blaming Era" because all he hears from the new guys is constant complaining and can't admit to just not being that good. The crowd unloads into a huge CM Punk chant which Triple H flawlessly talks over. Triple H says it's going to take more than a B+ player to make him lace his boots. Another old chant is resurrected, "Asshole"! Triple H says it's Daniel's turn. Ha! Daniel says that he does deserve this match, give him the match! Stephanie goes on a tangent about The Authority are the one's who made all of this happen from the TV trucks that pull up to the printing of the t-shirts... WE MADE YOU.
Daniel suggests that Stephanie put on HHH's gear, Trips can wear the skirt and he'll fight Steph at Mania. Triple H undermines Bryan, telling him he's not going to fall for the bait, it just isn't going to happen. Wrestlemania is for the SHOWCASE OF IMMORTALS. Daniel doesn't measure up, get out of his ring.
Daniel says it's their ring also! Triple H says that everything in this arena, including them, BELONG to HIM. Trips is on fire tonight. Speaking of fire, Steph calls out Kane after Daniel refuses to go but Bryan quickly attacks Kane until Security now comes out at Steph's demands to restrain him. As Daniel is sent away, it's still insisted that his match with Batista is still to come.
-Recap from Lesnar's attack earlier
-Off to the Raw Panel
Alberto is in the ring.
A Shelby Mustang rolls into the arena driven by Aaron Paul with Dolph Ziggler in the driver's seat.
Alberto Del Rio Vs. Dolph Ziggler w/Aaron Paul
Paul looks like he's having fun. He's going on commentary. Del Rio attacks Ziggler to start, taking it to Dolph. Ziggler counters his attack with a dropkick! Del Rio crawls to the corner, Dolph leaps onto the turnbuckle for a quick 10 Head Count. Dolph charges ADR but gets planted with a Tilt-A-Whirl Backbreaker. That gets a 2 count. Del Rio stays on offense but Aaron Paul stands on the announce table distracting ADR. Del Rio tries to apply the Arm Bar but Ziggler reverses into a zig-Zag. Aaron Paul... err Dolph Ziggler gets the win.
Winner: Dolph Ziggler
-Hall of Fame Inductee to be announced next!
-Paul Bearer is the next Inductee to the Hall!
Big E Vs. Jack Swagger
Both are already in the ring. Swagger gets a crack at him now for interrupting the match earlier. Cesaro comes in the ring, attacks Big E as soon as the bell rings! Neutralizer to Big E! Bell rings again.
Winner: Big E via DQ
Jack Swagger pushes Cesaro! Cesaro lets him get away with it until Swagger shoves him again! Cesaro sweeps Swagger and sets him up for the Big Swing! Uncle Zeb stops him, asks him not to do it and help his brother! Be a real american and help him up! Zeb plays mediator, asks them to hug it out now. Both guys each other a slapping hug as Zeb wants them too stand together and say WE THE PEOPLE!
-John Cena addresses the Wyatt Family...next!
John Cena is in the house! With a taped up knee, still in wrestling gear! The crowd gets on him with plenty of Boo's and CM Punk chants! John Cena said he was injured last week by the Wyatt's as the crowd explodes! He says he can't wrestle tonight, crowd chants Yes! Cena wants to get to the Wyatts but the crowd just wants CM Punk. John is handling this well also. However, John likes the energy of a passionate crowd. He runs down memories of being in the All-State Arena and the many bouts he's had there. He respects the city, understands everyone wants Change, but that change is going to have to go through him!
John changes gears, flawlessly, gets into Bray Wyatt but it isn't long until the Wyatt's cut in from the titantron. Bray tells John how long does he think he can hold them off. Mercy is calling his name, he is the reaper, and he will put John Cena down. The loneliest man in the world is the man who sits on top. Where will he be when he takes it all away?
-Lana comes out to introduce Alexandar Rusev who has the most awesome theme music! Boss battle time! He talks in Bulgarian but all the crowd can answer to that is with "What?"
-Hulk Hogan promo. He'll be on Raw next week.
Randy Orton comes out to join commentary.
Batista Vs. Daniel Bryan
Both guys lock up, Batista over powers Bryan, shoving him back. BOO-tista chants are here. Lock up, Bryan off the ropes, and dropped by a Shoulder Block. Tie up, Batista with a Headlock, off the ropes, and Bryan with a Dropkick to the Knee! Batista down and Bryan works the knee until Batista crawls to the bottom rope. Bryan stands on his throat, the ref counts him off. Bryan back on the attack to the knee. He drops Batista with a chest kick in the corner then pulls out the Animal and locks him in a Single-Leg Crab until he gets pushed off. Bryan strikes with punches and an uppercut but is dropped by a Clothesline from Batista. The Animal on offense now, he picks up Bryan and hangs Bryan over the top rope. Batista tosses Bryan from the ring which brings us to the last commercial break of the night.
It's officially "Overtime" on Raw. Bryan on offense! He gets two corner Dropkicks, tries for a third but Batista rolls out of the ring. Suicide Dive is the next best option! Batista goes back in the ring, Daniel climbs to the top, and Missile Dropkick! Repeated Chest Kicks to Batista! 2 count! Bryan looks to climb the top for a Headbutt but The Authority make their way out to distract Bryan. Batista knocks Bryan off the top rope, Bryan falls to the outside as Batista follows. The Animal throws Bryan into Orton then throws Daniel back in the ring. Batista mocks Bryan and eats a Roundhouse Kick for it.
Randy Orton comes in for the DQ. Orton went for the RKO on Batista but he reversed the RKO, pushing Orton into a Bryan Flying Knee! Daniel thinks about a Suicide Dive onto The Authority but gets grounded from a Spear by Batista. Kane comes in to get his licks in but Triple H stops him. Trips wants Bryan to stop his fantasy but Bryan kicks Hunter in the head! H is down. Batista delivers a Batista Bomb on Bryan! HHH pissed off gives Bryan a Pedigree and The Authority stands tall to close out the show.